Men dream of ideally mastering sexual techniques, while women prefer to have a perfect body. But problems in bed usually arise for other reasons, so even generic Viagra does not always help. American sexologist Laurie Watson tells what mistakes the representatives of both sexes make most often.
According to Watson (sexologist and family therapist, blogger, author of “Wanting Sex Again: How to Rediscover Your Desire and Heal a Sexless Marriage”), most men come to therapy to pump up their sexual skills. But the problem, as a rule, is not due to their nor ideal skills. The failure lies in one or more of the following male mistakes.
Wrong interpretation of the lack of women’s desire
The attractiveness of a woman to a man is immediately reported by his body. Just the appearance of unfamiliar beauty or their own partner can cause them a partial erection. Women are different. Their excitement is associated with imagination and fantasy, so they need more time to tune in to sex.
So do not take the lack of instant desire from a partner to heart. It is better to stretch out the process of seduction a little.
Experiencing of disappointment due to female slow excitement: This failure is closely related to the previous one. Women slowly adjust to sex and are slowly aroused. This is a matter of physiology, and nothing more. But if the partner feels that the man is disappointed with her speed and abilities, her desire intensifies even more slowly. Or completely disappears.
Solution: relax, take your time and enjoy every moment.
Go too far to the genitals
Many men prefer genital caresses to everything else and think that women share their wants. This is wrong. The physical excitement of a woman is not yet a signal for a rapid transition to the main areas. On the contrary, premature genital stimulation can even kill female desire.
The solution: it is better to wait a little longer, continuing to caress the whole body of the partner.
Concentrate on your erection
Men who take too much care of their erections can destroy the feeling of intimacy during sex. They often worry about own male power and look for over the counter Viagra.
If they are focused on delaying ejaculation, a woman may feel isolated and even forgotten. To reassure her, Watson advises men to stay in touch, tell her about desire.
If the erection, on the contrary, is weakening, it is good to use this time for an additional round of caresses or use the drug and watch how Viagra works.
In the case of a quick ejaculation, you can say to the partner that the reason is in her incredible sexuality. And resort to oral sex. It is no worse than a regular sexual intercourse.
Stimulate only the vagina
The glans of the clitoris is roughly the same as the glans of the penis. Does that mean that solely vaginal stimulation is not very effective? Yes, of course, there are exceptions. But all the same it is more often the clitoris – the center of sexual pleasure of the woman.